Today is THE day. I go for my new job orientation today. For ethical reasons, which will become more obvious to you as I share more about my job, I will not be allowed to share certain information about the community services board I will be working for. Whenever I do share interesting details about my job, I will try to be creative with the use of made up names, games, and places, you know. Could be the beginning of my adventures in story-telling, Miss Pattie!

Mary Ellen Copeland was the founder of a program that is beginning to take shape within many of the mental health communities throughout the state of Virginia. You can read more about the program I will be implementing within our district here. There will be several other aspects to my job besides WRAP. I will be working with local governments within our area, to help improve legislation within the mental health community. There has been a big turn of events within the system, since the Virginia Tech. tragedy that occurred on April 16th. I will find out more on the issues as I proceed. What an adventure! I am looking forward to learning, sharing, teaching, and of course, traveling. There will be a significant amount of training for this position; which will require a significant amount of travel.

I need to be sleeping at present; however, I have been awake since 6am. Nervousness abounds. I will be meeting people today with whom I will be working closely for the next few weeks. I have to arrive at the main office by 10:30am. and I am not certain at this point how long my day will be. I would be grateful to you, my blogging buds, if you would cross your fingers and toes for me today; mainly that I will be able to stay awake and alert for all the most important things I need to know. I believe that by the time 10:30am. actually arrives, I will be due for a nap....gosh almighty! I'll keep ya' posted. Of course, as we all know, orientations are often boring and more simplified than the actual jobs we do once we are thrown to the lions. Thus, my concerns about staying awake once my nerves settle. Peace out my brothers and sisters!

Cleaning the den, bookshelves and all, where the 9ft. tree shall stand--Exhausting.

Arranging the branches on the 9ft. tree--Painful scratches on arms.

Hanging 450 green lights upon the 9ft. tree--Aching legs and knees from moving up and down the ladder.

Going to bed now that the tree is up--Priceless!!

Will I find you this year? However will you bring us peace, in the midst of so much war and pain?

Will you speak to the hearts of those who are not with us? Oh, I hope I find you...Dear Christmas! I hope we all will find you.

"Hear me, my chiefs!

I am tired; my heart is sick and sad. From where the sun stands

I will fight no more forever."

                      Chief Joseph ~~ Nez Perce

You know, in a sense, we're all just turkeys waiting for Thanksgiving.

Went to the doctor. Found out that the feelings I've been having of needing to scream, and all my crying jags of late, have been related to the fact that I have the beginnings of yet another case of Shingles; and, in my scalp no less. Of course, I was already aware that my poor body was becoming run down. But as I so often do, I soldiered on in spite of the fact.

I was terrorized with the monsters at age 15. Thought I would die. They were all over my scalp then. When I got up to go to the bathroom, I passed out. It. Was. Bad. So anyways, I have been taking two very strong antibiotics round the clock since I came from the doctor's office yesterday. Waited two hours to see the doctor before he gave me the news; which took all of 5-10 minutes.

Hell opened up and tried to swallow me right then and there. But I said NO!!! I won't let you have me, by george! My soul is weary and I am quite weak; however, I have made potato salad, sweet potato casserole, and fresh green beans so far, for tomorrow's big feast. I will rest all next week, and hell can just wait...

Have a wonderful day with your friends and families.

Okay. I'm gonna' try to share with you through pictures, of how I am feeling so far this week. Of course I haven't been photographed as yet for this category of expression; however, I think I should do this one sometime soon.

I'm not quite feeling like this, yet. And I don't think things are as bad as all this. And though, I am not this far along, my knees are making me feel as such. Things are actually not quite as confusing as this. But, I think I am someplace in between this, and this; which are like at opposite ends of the spectrum for reasons to scream.

Now I am going over to Robert's place for a touch of serenity. His is one of the sweetest places I know to find peace for the soul.

I hope for you all to have a very Happy Thanksgiving. And, I am already praying that we all have a great new year. Figured I needed a head start on those prayers, and maybe some of you do too. ((Hugs))

Time is moving right along, and whether I am ready or not for the next great adventure, I can be certain one is coming. I can't believe it's been a week since I've written here. I seem to have lost myself in all the business of planning; planning for Thanksgiving dinner, planning for a two-week training coming up in December, and there is also the scheduling of visits to doctors, before I go into this intensive training for my new job. Planning...Scheduling...

And a week of what? I can't put my finger on any one major accomplishment this week, and that makes me nervous because I have been swamped with stuff to do.

I can't stand the feeling of losing myself in busy work. Sometimes I don't want to be in charge, ya' know? Sometimes I just want someone else to come along and tell me when I am going to do what, and where. But I know I wouldn't be able to cope with it; leaving it all to someone else. There are those times, however.

I went to see a play at the community college tonight. The focus on the dysfuntional family can be enlightening as well as devastating. The Effect of Gamma Rays on Man-In-The- Moon Marigolds spoke volumes to me. I knew a bit about the play before I planned to go. I knew I was not going there to be entertained. It is a piece to deciper and think about. I shall think about it for awhile...I will now want to read the book as well.

I haven't been sleeping well lately; so when I feel I can sleep, I go for it. Gonna' go do that very thing now. I feel I can sleep tonight. Peace out, my friends!

I didn't make an opportunity to try Starbuck's Pumpkin Spice Latte' last year.

Yesterday was quite an interesting adventure; and, the latte', oh my gosh! I shall crave it when I am not sipping it!

I practically fell outta' bed at 10:30ish. I had worked here in my computer room for hours on Friday; purging files, shredding junk mail and old receipts, etc. That kind of ritual exhausts me; and then I am frustrated because I never get anything else done when I bury myself in paperwork and such.

Sooooo, my plan after falling out of bed yesterday, was to run to town and complete one errand, and then come straight home and relax. Aaaaaaa. "The best laid plans of mice and men...." I ran into John again. Johnathan is a young man of 22 years, who loves to spend time with me. Now don't go getting all kinds of weird ideas here. Sam and I have known John since he was a baby. He is from the same town where Sam grew up. I lived with my husband in his hometown for 7 years of our marriage, and John was a wee little lad when I first lay eyes on him. He's a sweet guy who has suffered much loss in life. He loves our daughter, Victoria. Her personality suited him fine, and he used to have lunch with her and see her on karaoke nights at a local hot spot in town. Vic always sang every Wednesday night. What a gorgeous voice...Where was I? Oh yes, Johnathan. Love his heart. He does have issues to work through, but then, don't we all?

John flagged me down when I was driving into my bank's parking lot. He zoomed in beside me and said, "Meet me over at the BP station." "Okay", I answered. At the gas station, John asked what I had to do the rest of the day. "Well, not much. I planned to go back to bed for a bit, and then watch movies today." Needless to say, John had other plans. "Oh, lets take a ride." So I told him to jump in my car and we would take a little ride and talk for a bit.

"Have you ever been to Mountain Lake?", asked John, "No, I don't think I have." "You do know that Mountain Lake is where they filmed Dirty Dancing don't you?" With a blank look, I replied that I did not know this bit of information. John proceeded to quiz me about the movie, asking me if I even saw the movie. "Well of course I saw the movie twenty years ago, in fact." What I did not know, is that the movie was filmed in a gorgeous part of the country, only forty mintues away from where I live now.

Just as "Baby" Houseman's dream of going into the peace corp took a different turn for a moment that summer in 1963, my plan for yesterday took a different turn, and off to Mountain Lake Johnathan and I went! I was not disappointed with our spur of the moment plan. The only sad thing was that when we arrived at the mountaintop hotel and resort, the lake water had receded so, that there was almost no lake. Dry ground in areas where there should have been water. So sad; but, that's another article for another day.

I've started to keep my Kodak Cameo in my purse so that I would have it readily available for times and days such as these. John and I snapped picture after picture of the gorgeous autumn trees, the huge rock hotel,  the gazebo where major scenes of the movie took place, and the cottages all around the hotel. I will share those with you when they are developed. Still hoping for the digital camera guys! We had a lovely day; and now I know where Mountain Lake is. When I arrived home, I spoke with my mom about our little adventure and she told me that she had been there. Then, I spoke with a friend from back home who also expressed that she and her husband had been there. She asked me if I knew that was the place where Dirty Dancing was filmed--heh! Well, I know now.

I'm actually delighted and surprised that we have enjoyed a nice autumn here in southwest Virginia. I figured with as dry as the summer had been, the leaves would just fall from the trees for winter, and we'd see no color changes. For the past couple years, our autumns here have been lovely; the way I remember autumn from my childhood.

I didn't get to watch my collectors' dvd of Dirty Dancing last night, because when I got home from my little adventure with Johnathan, I had some catching up to do. Today, I shall watch the dvd and reminisce about actually being there. Sweet.

Heh. I've been going to both of these people; just usually not on the same day.

My counselor thinks I'm an okay kinda' gal. On the other hand, my physical therapist thinks my knees have a long way to go.

I'm not sure which of my therapists is more accurate in their perceptions of me today. I'm leaning towards the physical therapist though, because both my knees feel like shit. Not that I think my mental health isn't in tact; at least for today, that is. I am just focusing more on what hurts the most for now I guess. I mean, maybe I am an okay kinda' gal. I hope that I am, but I can't always be sure.

I travel back to the orthopedic specialist in Winston Salem on November 15th. I hope I do better at walking by then. I will tell him I cannot take the pain any longer. I don't walk these days; I hobble. And, when I am not hobbling, I am riding in wheelchair buggies through the stores. I am so not mentally geared to live in a hoveround. It's not that I don't think those babies are absolutely wonderful for folks to have; it's just that I am not willing to go that route at this point in life if I can do otherwise. I so miss walking the track for exercise. I don't mean to sound whiny, really. It's just that I am weary of the hobbling and I am weary of the pain. Too soon to be living this way, in so much pain, and for so long. Okay. I will stop now. No pity party here tonight. Things will be better...I shall say this mantra until I begin to believe it for myself.

Sam is making dinner; grilled cheese sandwiches and soup. Aaaah, sweet comfort food on this wonderfully chilly evening. I love it! I love the chill in the air. I love the color of the leaves. I love wearing my autumn and early winter clothes. Finally, the change is here; and here to stay awhile. Yes!! I am happy. See? I ended this post on a good note. What are you up to this evening?

Saint Therese' s Prayer
May today there be peace within.
May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be
May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you.
May you be content knowing you are a child of God. Let this presence settle into your bones,
and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love.
It is there for each and every one of us.